sheesh... i know i sound really pathetic since all my entries in this freakin blog has something to do with Shynee... well its not my fault right? I think of her every day. But this day is SUPPOSED TO BE special.... 1 year and 1 month na dapat kami... but it ended feb 25. sheesh. 10mos lang....3mos without her and im still so sad. same level as the 1st day. I really love her. Been reading her letters... must be over two hundred letters.... couldnt stop crying..... It really surprised me when she suddenly fell out of love.... those letters prove that she loved me... she really did.... but i just dont know why she changed her mind. Sigurado, i did something wrong.... I know i did.. and i regret it. Shynee, kung ano man ginawa ko, I am so sorry.... wish i still have you as my girl.... maybe in a different time,....,.,.,
But you know what? I learned something...... If theres one thing i should be happy about, its gonna be about: "at least it couldn't get any worse"........ That means i wont be able to experience anything worse than shynee breaking up with me. HHAHHAHAHa thats really pathetic.
im all out,,... my emotions are killing me... i regret every single moment that i took for granted... i could have been a better boyfriend to her.... could have been the best.. haaay.....
Anyway, been listening to music a lot... DVD's..... The corrs, Jesus Christ superstar....Im telling you, all rockstars suck in songwriting.... they all suck when you compare them to the corrs.... grabe, the lyrics hit you like a train. and melody... Oh, the melody gives your heart a million extra beats per minute. the songs "what can i do?" "old town" "only when i sleep" "toss the feathers" "radio" and "Everybody hurts" of the corr's mtv unplugged dvd... yan, listen to them and prepare a bucket for your tears.
"radio" by the corrs
It's late at night
And I'm feeling down
There're couples standing on the street
Sharing summer kisses and silly sounds
So I step inside
Pour a glass of wine
With a full glass and an empty heart
I search for something to occupy my mind
But you are in my head
Swimming forever in my head
Tangled in my dreams
Swimming forever
So listen to the radio (listen to the radio)
And all the songs we used to know, oh, oh
So listen to the radio (listen to the radio)
Remember where we used to go...
Now it's morning light
And it's cold outside
Caught up in a distant dream
I turn and think that you are by my side
So I leave my bed
And I try to dress
Wandering why my mind plays tricks
And fools me into thinking you are there
"what can i do?" by the corrs
I haven't slept at all in days
It's been so long since we've talked
And I have been here many times
I just don't know what I'm doing wrong
What can I do to make you love me
What can I do to make you care
What can I say to make you feel this
What can I do to get you there
There's only so much I can take
And I just got to let it go
And who knows I might feel better, yeah
If I don't try and I don't hope
No more waiting, no more, aching...
No more fighting, no more, trying...
Maybe there's nothing more to say
And in a funny way I'm calm
Because the power is not mine
I'm just going to let it fly
huhuhuhuhuh... dont tell me hindi ka maiiyak sa ganyang lyrics? Gosh, i wish the corrs could visit the Philippines... TATANGKILIKIN sila ng mga pinoy.//..... (lalim ba ng tagalog?) TATANGKILIKIN..... 
Anyway, so I ask Jesus what to do..... And since he doesnt really answer physically, i watch "Jesus Christ Superstar" once again..... And i Got his answer from the song "what's the buzz?"..... My question was "Jesus, what am i going to do without her?, is there anything left for me here? what's gonna happen to me?"
Jesus answers:
Why should you want to know?
Don't you mind about the future
Don't you try to think ahead
Save tomorrow for tomorrow
Think about today instead
I could give you facts and figures
I could give you plans and forecasts
Even tell you where I'm going
So that was it for me... Jesus, whatever you say.. i will follow....  Abraham was willing to sacrifice his son for you. Blindly. So I am to do the same... God, i love you. please take care of me. Please take care of everyone.... please do...
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sabay namin sa freedom bukas yey.